Wednesday, July 23, 2014

I Would 100% Binge Read All Of These Fake Middle Aged Harry Potter Books








These books are literally perfect. You know there has to have been times when Ginny's been getting on his case and Harry starts craving that sweet and sour sauce. So he logs on to FB and starts stalking Cho Chang. Just like you know Harry has bottled up resentment for not being able to pursue a professional quidditch career. My man dominated the game for six* whole seasons, but was forced put down the stick and save the world. That would be like LeBron hanging it up to negotiate peace talks after his first stint in Cleveland. That type of pent up fury could kill a man.

P.S. The "Harry Potter and The Wingardium Leviosa Spell That Lasted More Than 4 Hours" is laugh out loud funny. 

*I'm not sure if HP played the year he participated in the Triwizard Tournament 


2 Man Weave Podcast #4 with Miggs



In the latest edition of The 2 Man Weave Podcast, Miggs and I talk about millennial struggles,  the inevitable college tuition bubble and chasing your dreams. We also preview the New York Jets upcoming season and recap this summer's blockbuster movies (or lack thereof). 

@danye33 / @NickMiggs

Want to hear your question answered on-air? Fire an e-mail to dan.chiavetta@gmail.com. No topic is off limits. 

Monday, July 21, 2014

2 Man Weave Podcast #3 with Gary McClune and Keytwitty



In the latest edition of The 2 Man Weave Podcast, Gary, Twitty and I break down the fast food hierarchy, Malaysian Airlines, selfies and new hip-hop artists to keep an eye on. We also take an in-depth look at the cringe-worthy spin-off show "Girl Meets World," and try to make sense of the T.I./Floyd Mayweather beef. 

@danye33 / @Keytwitty / @LeBronaldReagan


Want to hear your question answered on-air? Fire an e-mail to dan.chiavetta@gmail.com. No topic is off limits. 


Friday, July 18, 2014

2 Man Weave Podcast #2 with Kevin Voelkel



In the latest edition of The 2 Man Weave Podcast, guest Kevin Voelkel and I discuss what's buzzing in the DC sports scene, the seemingly inevitable Wiggins for Love trade, an up for grabs Eastern Conference and the dysfunctional Lakers. We also dive deep into "The Leftovers," so if you're not caught up with HBO's post-rapture dystopia, stop listening at around the 14 minute mark. 

@dany33 / @KdotVdot 

Thursday, July 17, 2014

What Would Ja Do?


Do you ever find yourself confused, alone and unsure of what Ja Rule song would best suit your mood? If so, you're in luck! Thanks to a new website called Please Help Me Ja Rule, you'll never find yourself feeling that way again.

The site allows you to choose from one of five various levels of "How thug are you feeling?", ranging from "Like Ja Rule in 2001 (Pain Is Love era)" to "Why would I want to be a thug?". It then asks you "How emotional are you feeling?", with responses like "Crying R. Kelly tears of joy" and "My girl left me and I'm tryna listen to Jaheim."

Once your selections have been made, you click a PLEASE HELP ME JA RULE button and voila- a Ja Rule video pops up to get the party started!

***FULL DISCLOSURE***

If you're feeling more thug than 50 Cent at a candy shop, but also feel like serenading your baby mamma, you're gonna end up with "Between Me And You."



-fresh (@danye33)

Wednesday, July 16, 2014

Check Out Episode #1 Of The 2 Man Weave Podcast!



After years of toying with the idea but coming up with every excuse in the book to put it off ("My computer is slower than Eddy Curry," "I have no idea how to do this" etc.) Gary and I finally decided to get down to business and dip our toes in the podcasting game. We've spent multiple hours a week for the better part of the past four years talking on the phone about sports, and now it's time to get our opinions out there to the masses.

I hosted a radio show in college and he hosted a semi-popular podcast back in 2010, so this isn't entirely new to us. But there's for sure going to be some kinks and growing pains as we work to perfect our craft and put out the best podcast possible for our readers (and hopefully now listeners!).

In episode #1 we break down our favorite types of fantasy football leagues to play in, go over a barrage of "Who would you rather (draft)?", talk about which sleeper quarterbacks have a shot at finishing up this season in the top 5 and the time I tried out to play Urkel's son on Family Matters.



We're both very excited to see where this new project takes us. The possibilities are endless, and I speak for myself when I say the ideal end game here is to someday get the audio from our podcasts available for download on iTunes.

Any and all feedback will be greatly appreciated, so please write in (dan.chiavetta@gmail.com) or tweet us (@danye33 / @LeBronaldReagan) with any comments, ideas or questions that you would like answered on air!



-fresh

Tuesday, July 8, 2014

Allen Iverson's Top 100 Crossovers



I just spent the past 15 minutes watching this incredible mixtape, and even though I should be happy because it's bringing back great memories, I can't help but get genuinely bummed out with how A.I.'s career played out. I know that despite Tim Duncan's best effort father time remains undefeated, but Iverson was gone way too soon. Ray Ray, Kobe and Nash are still kicking (or in some cases, limping) from that epic '96 draft class, yet the last time The Answer laced it up on an NBA court LeBron was still in Cleveland.

Iverson transcended the game for better and worse, on and off the court, and it's important that compilations like this exist to show the next generation that he was much more than an elite scorer who once made it to the Finals with Eric Snow as his backcourt mate. Instead that he was one of the most fearless, big time players the league has ever seen. It didn't matter if it was Gary Payton or Michael Jordan guarding him, they weren't staying in front once he got to crossing.

And that step back though... good lawd.



-fresh (@danye33)

Say It Ain't So! Crumbs Bakery Is No More


The nation's largest specialty cupcake chain is calling it quits. The New York-based company told employees it would be shutting down all of its stores at the end of the business day on Monday. 

Founded in 2003 on Manhattan's Upper West Side, the bakery offered dozens of varieties of gourmet baked goods. It was at the forefront of the cup cake boom of the late 2000's and eventually expanded more than 60 locations across the country. 

But things turned stale last week, when NASDAQ suspended the trading of Crumbs shares, claiming the company failed to meet benchmarks for a market cap or annual net profit, or that the company no longer had at least $2.5 million in shareholder equity.

And just like that my dreams of one day devouring their majestic, "colossal" cupcake went up in sprinkles.


I can't prove it, but I'm 96% sure that the cupcake ATM is somehow behind this.. 

-fresh (@danye33)

Friday, June 27, 2014

14 Burning Questions From The 2014 NBA Draft


1) How were there no top 10 shenanigans?

In a draft touted for its star caliber and depth, no one traded out of the top 10. No one reached for a player they should've traded back for. Every team in the top 10 made a sensible pick that appeared to fit their roster, including and especially teams like Cleveland and Sacramento who have made questionable lottery selections in the past. How is this possible? Has this ever happened before? Will it ever happen again? It seems too good to be true. 

2) Wiggins, Parker and Embiid went 1-2-3 as expected. Who will this come back to bite?

At this point in history, this is the universally accepted hierarchy for these three prospects.. Any of the three could go on to be a ten-time All-Star, and no one would be surprised. The Cavs may come to regret taking Wiggins, but going into next season, he's the best fit for their roster. The Bucks got what they wanted in Jabari Parker. Milwaukee needs a go-to guy to make a difference right away, and they believe that Parker is that player. The 76ers seem to still be in the preliminary stages of their rebuilding process. Embiid will most likely take two full seasons to rehabilitate and adjust to the NBA level. Their 12th pick, Dario Saric may not come to the NBA for two or three seasons, if at all, and their fans don't seem to mind. They're sold on a long term roster reconstruction, so everyone comes away feeling like a winner. For now. 



3) Does Aaron Gordon to the Magic make perfect sense? How did we not see this all along?

They're building an excellent defensive team in Orlando. Victor Oladipo, Aaron Gordon and Elfrid Payton have a lot in common in terms of being two-way players who work hard, are extremely competitive and all seem to really love the game of basketball. Whether Gordon plays the 3 or the 4, he and Vucevic can both protect the rim, and if he can continue to improve offensively, he'll be a great long term fit for Orlando. The Magic came into this draft knowing they needed an athletic big man and a point guard, and they executed a successful game plan. Time will tell if a Exum or Vonleh would've been a better choice, but I think Gordon is an excellent fit. 

4) Dante Exum and Trey Burke are excited to play together, but who's the point guard?

Exum to the Jazz is another smart pick by a rebuilding team. Utah has Favors and Kanter up front, and a budding wing man in Gordon Hayward. However, no one in Utah is sure if Trey Burke is a one or a two, and the same may be true for Exum. Considering he was the best player on the board for Utah, Exum's potential makes him worthy of gambling the fifth pick on. It will be interesting to see who handles the ball and in what capacity for the Jazz moving forward.

5) Does Marcus Smart's arrival in Boston signify the departure of Rajon Rando?

It's unclear if Marcus Smart is expected to play in lieu of Rondo next season, or alongside him. For an organization with an aggressive front office and many tradable assets, anything is in play here. My guess is that Smart is truly a point guard, and the Celtics will look to move Rondo before his contract expires. While it may in fact be the best course of action for Boston, having Smart on their roster hurts their trade leverage in any deal involving Rondo, unless the Celtics proclaim a true desire to play both guards together at the same time. 


6) Will Julius Randle have the chance to make a playoff run with Kobe Bryant in the next two seasons?

Randle could end up being a major steal for the Lakers at 7. He might be the most NBA-ready player in the draft next to Jabari Parker, which is good news for a Los Angeles team eager to get back into the playoff picture in the West. The Lakers desperately need a quality big man, and there aren't many in free agency. If Randle can contribute right away, and Kobe Bryant's legs can hold up despite multiple injuries, the Lakers could be just one or two players away. If not, it could get ugly. Quick. LA still hasn't hired a coach, and it would be a shame to see an aging Kobe berate and ostracize Randle the way he did with Dwight Howard.  

7) Were the seven best prospects taken with the top seven picks?

Depending on how you feel about Noah Vonleh, it seems so. The NBA Draft, like most amateur drafts, is a crapshoot. We convince ourselves that there are tiers and clear differences in potential, and we're proven wrong every year. However, something about this draft feels different, and it wouldn't surprise me at all is Wiggins, Parker, Embiid, Gordon, Exum, Smart and Randle separate themselves from the rest of the prospects in this draft. All seven have shown rare talent and All-NBA potential.


8) What is Sacramento's plan with Nik Stauskas and Ben McLemore

In the stage that the Kings are in, they could realistically stand to upgrade spots 1-4 around DeMarcus Cousins. McLemore struggled despite playing at 82 games last season, and Stauskas gives them a quality player and roster flexibility going forward. 

9) If Noah Vonleh is the player some scouts think he is, how good could the Charlotte Hornets be?

The Hornets were the only playoff team drafting in the top 10. They have plenty of cap space to sign one or more quality free agents, and if their young players continue to develop, and Al Jefferson can stay healthy, it's possible that Charlotte could win 50+ games and host a second round playoff series as early as next season. Keep an eye on the Hornets as a possible destination for second tier free agents like Luol Deng, Pau Gasol, and Kyle Lowry. 

10) Can Doug McDermott play defense well enough to stay on the floor for Chicago?

My gut feeling is yes.  The Bulls like to play big up front, so it's hard to imagine him playing the stretch 4, at least right away. Tom Thibodeau likes to keep a small rotation, and has a history of burying players on the bench if they can't defend their position. He also has a history of getting the most out of his guys, and this feels like a good value for a playoff team trading up for a lottery talent. He'll help to stretch the floor and add scoring on the wing of an offense that desperately needs it. McDermott could carry a depleted bench unit, or even become a trade asset in a deal for a star player like Kevin Love or Carmelo Anthony.

11) Can and will Zach LaVine earn back the respect of Minnesota fans?


Poor Timberwolves fans, who are already moving on from Kevin Love even though he's still on the team. LaVine's frustration is understandable. I would be upset if I was essentially forced to work in Minnesota for between 4 and 8 years. Although, on live television, in front of millions of people, he pouted like a grade schooler who got picked last in a playground game. So many of the players drafted before him were gracious, humble, and overwhelmed by the moment. LaVine, by contrast, seemed irritated. It will be interesting to see how he tries to spin this blunder going forward, and how quick Wolves fans are to forgive and forget.

12) Does it make sense for Phoenix to start next season with Dragic, Bledsoe, AND Tyler Ennis?

I think they can make it work, but this feels like the beginning of the end for someone in the Suns backcourt. It seems more likely that they would look to move Bledsoe, considering his contract status, injury history, and streaky long-range shooting. However, an Ennis-Dragic back court would be small and could have a lot of trouble defending many of the young guard combinations in the Western Conference. There's also a chance that Ennis plays a limited role next season, and that Phoenix uses the last year of Eric Bledsoe's rookie contract to scout their young talent before making a decision. 

13) Is it okay for Knicks fans to be irrationally thrilled with their two second round picks?

YES, YES, and YES a third time! As a native New Yorker, I like to think that Phil Jackson pulled two rabbits out of his hat, when last week, he didn't even have a hat to pull rabbits out of. Cleanthony Early went 10 picks too late, regardless of the concerns about his true position in the NBA. No one knows much about Thanasis Antetotokounmpo other than the fact that he's the Greek Freak's brother, but that paired with his lone season in the D-League is enough to make New Yorkers excited for his arrival. Depending on whether or not Carmelo Anthony returns to The Big Apple, both draft picks could carve out a role for themselves immediately on a Knicks team looking to turn over a new leaf. 

14) Is Lebron James the reason the Miami Heat drafted Shabazz Napier?


This didn't hurt.



This didn't either


-John Fontanelli (@JohnAnthony37)